Millennials,
Families are what make us familiar with the
concepts and ideas that we have today. There also happens to be four
different types of theories that can be used to explain family phenomena’s, and
they are exchange theory, symbolic interaction theory, conflict theory, and
family systems theory. Today in my blog I will be focusing on the family system
theory. This theory helps identify the roles that each person has within the
family, and how they contribute.
With my own family, the roles are spread out
between the member of my family. My fathers’ role for our family is the
provider; he works ten hours day in- order to make all three girls in his life
happy. My mother is stay at hope mom,
but that doesn’t mean that she doesn’t have a role or contribute to our family.
In fact, my sisters and I often see her as the discipliner. Though some people
would see this as a bad thing I don’t, I know that my mom is just trying to
make me a more mature young adult. My sisters and I also have roles, but
smaller ones in compression to my parents. Carrington, my younger sister her
role comes off as the one who doesn’t let anyone bother her. She is often the
one that we turn to when we need some kind of “protection” from someone. Kylie
on the hand, she is my married sister, and she is the brains of the three of
us. We always ask her questions about English and writing because she is so
good at it. And me, I am usually the funny goof ball who tries to bring peace when there is a conflict. This is my family system, and it may be
different from yours, but that’s okay not everyone is going to be the same.
When it comes to discipline my mom like to
give us feedback is the most loving way possible. She will sit my sister and I
down and give us a what I like to call a “life talk.” These "life talks" are kind of like corrective
feedback. Corrective feedback is when behavior is bad or not acceptable. The “life talks” consist of negative feedback that my mom has noticed we were doing. My mom like to do a question answer type form of her famous “life talk.” It begins with
her asking us why we made the bad decision that we did. Then she listens to what we say, and she
tells us what we could have done instead. Her favorite line to use with us is
“Why lie if you know that the punishment is only going to be worse than if you
would have just told the truth?” I like this because it is a positive way to
discipline us. My sisters and I get to know why my mother doesn’t like certain
things, but this also allows the four of us to grow closer together. Though we
get negative feedback from my mother it influences us in a positive way to
where we change our behavior.
I
hope that today’s blog has helped you understand that family systems theory,
and that you can identify each of the roles in your family. I would like to
remind you that each family system is unique and different from each other.
Some family systems even have sub systems; which is pretty much a system within
a system. Those subsystems can be identified as parental or marital subsystem.
With my personal experience with corrective feedback form my mother, I hope this has
opened your eyes on how negative feedback can be good for you. If all we got
was positive feedback we would never grow or progress. Negative feedback allows
us to have a behavior change, and makes you stop doing what you were
before. Lastly, I would like to close
with a quote By President Spencer W. Kimball, he says “Each of us has more
opportunities to do good and to be good than we ever use. These opportunities
lie all around us. Whatever the size of our present circle of effective
influence, if we were to improve our performance even a little bit, that circle
would be enlarged. There are many individuals waiting to be touched and loved
if we care enough to improve in our performance.”
Blogger,
Laken
Nordin
